Friday, May 20, 2011

End Of The World?

        All right, so a bunch of folks are telling me the end of the world is TODAY. So, I decided to investigate about it, and right from the moment I read of it, I knew this was too good to be true. Many guys don't even know why the end of the world is supposedly today. Let's see:

        When God decided to flood the Earth for some reason, he told Noah: "Seven days from now I will send rain on the earth for forty days and forty nights, and I will wipe from the face of the earth every living creature I have made." That's the Bible right there. Genesis, more precisely. When he said seven days, he supposedly meant seven thousand years. Remember the joke?

-God, what's a second for you?
-A million years.
-And what's a cent to you?
-A million dollars.
-So can you give me a cent?
-Just a second.

        Yeah, so apparently, he'd be making a comeback 7,000 years later. If this is true, it'd be interesting to see the Creator in person, wouldn't you think? Since the Great Flood was in 4,990 BC, then supposedly this is 7,000 years later. So let's say that this is true. What about May 21? All right.

        So the conspiracy theorists (yeah, those crazy guys) checked the difference of days between the crucifiction of Christ and May 21, 2011, and saw that the difference was 722,550 days. So, what does this mean? Do the math: 5x10x17x5x10x17. Still clueless? Read the Bible. Five signifies redemption, ten signifies completion, and 17 signifies heaven. The numbers represent the day of redemption (5), the end of the era of Christianity (10), and the ascent to heaven (17). The numbers are doubled for a sort of emphasis on the significance of this. The damn mystery I'd like solved: How the hell do they figure this out?

        Now, I'm a nonbeliever. You might (or will) want to argue with me, but that's not the point right now. The point is that whatever we read through the Bible can't be considered fact, if not belief. How many people believed the world would end in 2000? Remember, I mean no disrespect, but add the uncertainty of the Bible, mistranslations, and then multiply it all by some conspiracy theorists who got the info out somehow, and it doesn't really seem to be something too credible, now, doesn't it? You could bring up Nostradamus. Uh-uh. His predictions were extremely ambiguous. Now, you explain how we survived the turn of the milennia, and this one: June 6, 2006?

        Don't worry folks, you'll live to see the sun and kiss your mommies in the cheek tomorrow. Remember that conspiracy theorists don't usually have it right, why? They tend to overthink things. Don't do the same mistake, and relax.