Tuesday, October 4, 2011

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5: Weird Creatures That Supposedly Exist

                 Halloween's just around the corner, and this month will have a huge bunch of posts of paranormal shit. So, today we will talk about species supposedly found in cryptozoology. I won't talk about already debunked myths, like the Loch Ness Monster, but there's still a few creatures worth mentioning...

5: The Moth-Man

                 This first guy, who just sounds like a super-lame supervillain, is a, you guessed it, half-moth, half-man. He's supposedly a bit tall, with red eyes, huge wings, and damn hairy. Some say his eyes are actually in his chest, that he has no head. I don't really give shit, I'm a skeptic. But, if I ever found this guy, I'd bring a huge fly swatter to a fight. 

It's, beautiful!

4: The Jersey Devil

                  There's many descriptions for the Jersey Devil, found in no other place than New Jersey, some say he's like a tall horse with long hair and red eyes and a demonic complexion. A friend actually told me that his cousin, a hunter, saw the beast's prints on the ground once. It's a bit hard to believe, and I will once I meet this creature face to face (and then possibly die). 

Yeah, it totally doesn't look like a photoshopped video-game guy or toy or whatever.

3: Yetti Or Bigfoot

                 Basically the same thing, it looks like a huge guy on a gorilla suit. It can be in the alps, it can be in the Rocky Mountains, I don't know, there's a lot of variations of the story. The hunt for him has been very intense, and still, no results (It's a guy in a gorilla suit!)

That's the guy who used to troll grandpa's economy class.

2: Chupacabra

                 Like the Bigfoot, this one has a lot of versions. Some say it's a small, bat-like lizard, others say it's huge, but there have been weird cases of animals losing all of their blood all of a sudden, as if something vampirish sucked it out of them. Who knows if it would ever be found, but if it is, then it would be AWESOME to have that in a zoo. 

Come here, so I can punch your teeth down your throat.

1: Giant Squid

                Although their existence has already been proven, it is known that in many tales the Giant Squid gave a lot of problems to sailors and the like. They have been mentioned in both pirate stories (as the Kraken, maybe), and even in Jules Verne's books. Not only have giant squids been caught, but, wait for it, collosal squids, which are about two or three times bigger than a giant squid. 

Giant Squid? Ok, it seems pretty -
OMGWTFBBQ!


                So, although many species have been discovered, many are still unknown and may possess rare and unique abilities never heard of, so if you find a new animal, first of all, kill it with fire, and then send it for research. 

Figure 1.