Tuesday, January 29, 2013

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What Has Society Done To Internet Memes?

         Ah, memes. Coined by Richard Dawkins and later coined in an alternative version by the Internet, it is simply an ideology which gets widespread in a society. One of the earliest Internet memes, which I hold with great fondness, is that of the dancing baby, which got widespread in 1996, but actually appeared on the Ally Mcbeal show in 1990. 

         Then, the Internet itself got more widespread and some of the more arcaic memes like Lolcats, 2 Girls 1 Cup (No, it's not a good idea to watch it), the Star Wars kid, Numa Numa guy, and memes took various shapes and sizes, it could have been a video clip (Tron Guy), a website (goatse [I don't even know if it exists anymore]), phrases (All your base are belong to us; has anyone ever been far as decided to go look more like?), images (lolcats), jokes (rick roll; scary maze game), and parodies (Kanye West interruption). 

        The website 4chan was responsible for starting many memes, and from it came the Epic Fail Guy among many others, but nowadays they are the first critics for whatever becomes popular. Why? Allow me to explain. 

I can kinda wrap it up with this image.
         The internet's memes used to be more closed off to general society, which allowed things with more obscure origins to become popular. Then, more and more people began to access the web, and of course, they were entitled to their own comedy, so then you started getting shitty memes that became popular with people with a shitty sense of humor. 

Well now, isn't this depressing?
          I haven't been on 9gag for a year and a half now (I didn't last more than a month looking at it), and I'm quite sure that if I last five minutes I will see a lot of the same memes being used again and again, with a couple new additions from reddit, plus a few horribly written, mediocre jokes, pictures of cute things and a lot of friendzone complaining. 
Thank you, Boromir.
        Come on, has anybody a sense of originality anymore? I'm really glad I haven't seen RageFaces in a long while now, but there's a bunch of other things that are being repeated a lot, and damn if there aren't any recurring topics throughout the years (le; pokemon; etc.). And please, please, please, pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee stop joking about Slenderman. His stories weren't even scary, his videogame's been around for years now, please stop with the goddamn Slenderman crap.

There, face your fear or whatever.

Sunday, January 27, 2013

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Is It Right To Make Everything Politically Correct?

Wikipedia defines political correctness as such:

"Political correctness is a term which denotes language, ideas, policies, and behavior seen as seeking to minimize social and institutional offense in occupational, gender, racial, cultural, sexual orientation, certain other religions, beliefs or ideologies, disability, and age-related contexts, and, as purported by the term, doing so to an excessive extent."

Oh, well, does this remind me of something?
          Why am I quoting Wikipedia? Wouldn't it be more professional to quote some source that's more trusted? I don't give a shit. That's the first politically incorrect moment in this blogpost, now pay attention, and pay attention good, political correctness is common sense that has become a sort of rule in society one must obey so they don't offend pansies that get offended when you don't mention something the way they want it to. 

           So, if this is meant to please people, why is it a problem? Well, in some way, it hides out what's wrong with a society the same way those guys in Harry Potter wouldn't say the word "Voldemort" (I've said it many times, so what). It's like saying the N-word. Of course, you're not going to call a black man a nigger, but doesn't it sound stupid to call somebody African American, for example, if he's not African, and especially if he's not American either?

            The problem is that people similar to those in the demographic of overprotective suburban mothers and the like are exaggerating this to the portion that things that don't need to be censored (censorship being already a problem in itself) are being censored, to the point that people are actually complaining about hearing the words "illegal immigrant", or like Steve Carrel's character said in The Office: "Let me ask you, is there a term besides 'Mexican' that you prefer? Something less offensive?" Stuff like that is actually happening in real life.

            Now, if I'm advocating against political correctness, does that mean that I'm pro-offense? Hell no. What I mean is, don't be a dick if you don't want to make enemies, but don't sugar-coat everything you say either. "But what if they start saying curse words in television programs designated for age groups such as babies and toddlers?!?" The horror, right? Here's the thing, there are still rules. You're not going to turn Barney the Dinosaur into Barney the Alcoholic Lizard.

            So yeah, please, try to leave political correctness behind. It's almost like you want this to develop into an Orwellian nightmare, to which I say, no, fuck no. If any society wants to advance, they have to accept the world as it is, and not turn it into a world of gay unicorns and rainbows so nobody will be offended. Or what, you're going to call the short and tall kids vertically disadvantaged and vertically advanced at some point?  

Saturday, January 12, 2013

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The Difference Between Loneliness And Solitude

       Many times I hear people using loneliness and solitude as interchangeable terms. There is a fundamental difference to between the two words, and I'm going to clear up this common misconception with a simple explanation. 

      Loneliness is when one is alone, not by choice, but because of the situation or the people around him. The lonely man strives to be with others when they are not willing to be with him, for which one says that one is suffering loneliness. It's a sentiment that can consume you on the inside to the point of changing you, sometimes fundamentally, and most of the times it's not for the better. 

       Solitude is glorious. When one is alone by his own choice, to organize his thoughts, clear his head, or any one of the many possibilities, one is said to be enjoying solitude. This state of person and mind is rare to find in an extrovert but very common in an introvert, and is not comprehended by those who constantly seek to be with others. Some need more, some need less, but it is always one's own choice and for one to enjoy. 

    Now that you understand the difference, you can see that although they are similar, they are also opposites, as one implies suffering and the other implies, if not joy, at least peace and a calm state of mind. Keep in mind though, the solitary man can sometimes have too much of it, in which his solitude will become loneliness, but of course, those who know how to be alone don't suffer loneliness for long. 

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

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How To: Burn Fat

Shocking fat person picture number one.
         Hey there. If you're reading this, I'm assuming that at least some of you have a few pounds you want to get rid of (No, I am not calling you fat, paranormal woman. Yes, I know who you are.) How can you trust me? This year I lost twenty kilograms, or about 45 pounds. If I could do that, then you can do it too. I'm not getting into specifics, but hear me out. If you don't believe me, here's a before and after pic.

Yup. That's me. Like I said, if I could do it, you can do it, too.

I know what you're thinking.
I know a few people who have done it too. This guy, for example, was one of the guys who inspired me:
No, I am not shitting you.

       There is no secret. There is no magic recipe. No secret formula. No pill. No wonder. No miracle. It's just you and your calories, and the secret to losing weight is consuming less calories than you burn every single day. Now, how does that work? Pay attention. 

You can't pay attention if you're hearing crunching, damn it.
        Imagine your body is a bank. The currency is calories, and whenever there's a surplus, there's nothing for them to do so they just get fucking stashed there in a vault. The vault is your body and the calories are stashed in fat like money is stashed in whatever the hell it's stashed. The thing is, it accumulates. What does that mean for you? Abundance. Of fat. In your stomach. And thighs. And pretty much everywhere else, you fat bastard. 

Do fat people deserve the hate? Well, you can actually stop eating.
         What can you do about it? Make good choices. Instead of, say, those scrumptious five slices of pizza, have three of those and a salad to fill yourself up. Sushi? Eat it raw. French fries? Don't supersize them. Chicken? Take the skin off. That kind of thing, those kinds of small changes are very important. If you drink a lot of coke, get diet coke, trust me, you'll get used to it, normal coke will disgust you, you will literally (Read: figuratively) vomit because of all the sugar. Beer? Light beer. 

This here. This shit right here. It's a goddamn miracle and it's time you saw that.
        Also, exercise regularly, and I'm not saying fucking destroy your muscles in a day so you can't move the rest of the week. Go slow. Start with thirty minute walks. Then one hour walks. Then jog a bit, you know, go up the ranks, and you'll get used to it. And when you get hungrier, eat until you're satisfied, not until you're full, and if you're still hungry, drink water or diet coke or some shit. 

Water: That loaf of bread restaurants give, but for skinny people.
       Those small changes are more than enough for you to lose a bit of those extra pounds. I lost weight while eating hamburgers, tacos, sushi, hell, sometimes I even ate pizza, which is a buttload of calories. You can have your cake and eat some of it too, but don't eat it all. As you can see, it's not even torture, it's just a matter of making the right choices bit by bit. It takes a whole lot of an effort to be thin, but trust me, once you lose weight, you realize, it takes a whole lot of an effort to be fat, too. So, what are you going to work for?

So yeah, bring it on.

Sunday, January 6, 2013

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Book Review: The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy

            The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy book series by Douglas Adams is seriously wonderful. It is a science fiction, humor, and drama all rolled into one. The "trilogy" of five books tells the epic tale of Arthur Dent, Ford Prefect, Zaphod Beeblebrox, Tricia McMillan, and Marvin the Paranoid Android, all of whom travel around the galaxy, back and forth through time and parallel universes. 

         The story begins with Arthur's house about to be demolished, while the Earth is about to be demolished for a hyperspace bypass. Ford Prefect saves Arthur and they hitch a ride in a Vogon ship, which angers the Vogons. They are released through an airlock and appear in space, and against extreme odds, they are picked up by none other than Zaphod Beeblebrox. From there, they go to Magrathea, where they start trying to find the answer to life, the universe and everything, and once they do, they start looking for the Ultimate Question. They go to the restaurant at the end of the universe, to stop a murderous civilization, and do a lot more, with nothing but their wits and luck, the latter being the abundant. 

                 The books contain a tremendous amount of creativity and humor, what with a lot of concepts being created by Douglas Adams and the characters and situations they find themselves in are simply hilarious, it's a book series that will forever prevail as one of the most recognized science fiction works. It was enough to inspire a television show, a movie, a radio show, and has inspired countless people in many ways. Now, to survive, you just need to know two words: Don't Panic. 

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Book Review: 1984

          So, I got a Kindle, which means I'll now get to a whole awful lot of reading, and the first book I took the pleasure of reading electronically was 1984 by George Orwell. A book that was published in 1949, it stands as a warning of a future which we are to prevent from happening. 

      People are closely watched constantly from every single place you could imagine, including their televisions. Public executions are regarded as entertainment. History is altered. People are conditioned to love Big Brother, the ruler of Oceania, the location in which this novel takes place. 

          What makes this novel so great? The fact that the results of a full-on tyranny are shown in such detail, the increasing feeling of despair that you get, the emotions of the characters involved, the creativity of the dystopia which George Orwell created, amongst other things. 

         One of my favorite aspects was the alteration of the English language. Called "Newspeak" in the novel, it involved a lot of things, for example, "crimethought", which was simple thinking something that went against the government's ideals, "doublethink", which actually requires doublethink to understand, which involves something to be true, and being able to reject it in the name of the government, which was the main reason Big Brother could rule as he did. There's also a lot of repression besides physical; the most important psychological repression is possibly the sexual, sex here being considered a duty to the government. 

          The novel is a work of art and you should read it, not only for entertainment, but to consider the fact that we're lucky enough to live in a society where we can have freedom and know most of the truth about the world, because there are always going to be things hidden from the public. Get the book as soon as you can, read it, cry for a bit and then appreciate the reality we live in. 

What a reality, huh?